I have always been someone with a precise idea of what I was doing next. Originally this came from my parents, they had a precise idea of what they wanted me to do next, but eventually I took ownership of that course. Planning can obviously be a very helpful thing, and is definitely necessary to an extent. But planning, like anything else in life, can become a negative thing if you find yourself focusing too much attention on it. God has a plan for your life as well, and your plan should account for that fact. (James 4:14)
Besides that, focusing too much on the future causes us to miss the present. There is a balance to be found between investing in the future and seizing the moment. I have many options available to me in my future, as a result of past investments I made for the future. That future is now, so that investment was worth it, but it was definitely a gamble. If I had died at 23, I would have spent nearly my entire life preparing for a future that I never experienced. Since then, I have made a major theatrical film, spent five more summers at camp, and established a large degree of financial freedom.
When I was in high school, I developed a vision of what I wanted to do in my career. I laid out a series of goals that I wanted to accomplish. These included: being the "technology guy" at a small company, building the entire infrastructure for a company from scratch, using the newest and fastest computers on the market, helping to develop new cutting edge tools, and creating new ways to do existing tasks. In the five years since I graduated college, I have managed to clearly accomplish every one of those objectives.
My plans have helped me succeed in areas of life that I naturally excel in, but in aspects of life that I struggle with, my plans have been of little assistance. Certain things can’t be calculated and planned, and that is where we see our need for God and his plan for our life. (Proverbs 19:14) Giving up control of our lives to God is no simple task, and requires faith, which is why it is an important step.
I like to compare planning in my life to the little computer game where you lay pipes trying to stay ahead of the flow of water. Sometimes you have a lot of extra pipes ahead, and other times you are barely keeping up, but the water approaches at a constant speed. Time is like that flow of water, constantly marching forward, whether we are prepared or not. And as far as the pipes go, in my life, the water reached the end of the pipe around November of last year. This didn't result in a big mess the way I previously feared it might, but it definitely changed things.
Nothing bad has happened as a result of the removal of my own death grip on the course of my life, so I am learning to trust God in new ways. In certain ways it has given me a whole new perspective on the smaller details, and I am becoming more flexible with the few plans I do have. I am also letting go of the control I usually exert over those around me, which is an issue that God revealed to me last spring. It is all sort of a process of “loosening up” about life in general. God has blessed me, and my barns are full, but what should I do next? The Bible makes it clear what not to do, (Luke 12:16-20) but I am still seeking guidance from God about how best to use the position he has put me in.
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