The next major step in life was school, starting with Kindergarten. This was quite a transition, but with a class of about 15 people, it wasn't too bad. There were four kids in my class whose families all carpooled with us. We frequently ended up at each other's houses after school, and therefore were friends at school as well. There were two guys and two girls, and back then I didn't make much distinction between the genders.
The progression from there to first grade was fairly smooth, I even got to keep the same teacher, so most of those memories blend together a bit, but we got desks by then. I was probably a reasonably normal kid at that point, both socially and academically.
Things definitely went down hill at school after that. My second grade teacher was an elderly nun, who may not have been cut out to be dealing with kids anymore. I got A’s in all my academic subjects and C’s in both effort and conduct. Looking back, that should have been an indication to my parents of a problem with the school, if I can still get A’s with a lack of effort.
The biggest problem was that one of the primary troublemakers in the class really had it in for me, and found various ways to get me into trouble. Once I had a reputation for getting into trouble, and suffering the consequences, I started actually earning it. Hence the C’s in conduct. It’s a classic example of people acting in ways to meet the expectations placed on them.
On top of that, the only other guy in our carpool switched schools that year, leaving just me and the two girls. While there is nothing inherently wrong with that, my teacher noticed that I was closer friends with them than the guys in my class. She recommended that my parents isolate me from girls so that I would get better at socializing with guys.
It would appear that they did a pretty good job between then and when I graduated from high school. I was not aware of what they were doing, but I do remember suddenly not being friends with the girls from my carpool, and not knowing why. It wasn't until college that I was able to resume having relaxed social interactions with females. I am now proud to have a number of significant friendships with females, but that is the result of years of deliberate effort to reverse most of the effects of that “socialization” process.
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