Game of Thrones is a very popular TV series, set in a medieval world, during a violent conflict. It has been criticized for violence, sexuality, and all sorts of other course things. It is true that it depicts all sorts of terrible things on screen, but I don't necessarily see that as a bad thing as long as it doesn't glorify those things. It usually graphically portrays all of the horrors and outcomes of those things that are very real in our own world, even if we usually sanitize any sign of them from our own daily lives. But there is one thing that is portrayed in a very different light than modern society is accustomed to: marriage.
Marriage is clearly in the process of being redefined in our culture, from the unconstitutional "a union between a man and a woman," to the more open ended and acceptable: "a loving bond." Notice that the word love is not even in the first "traditional" definition. Modern society thinks that love is the only thing that matters, and that this recent change is a case where love wins. But what happens when that "love" is no longer actively being felt. If that was the basis for the bond, then the marriage is over, and it is time for divorce. And then we see that on its own, love does not win. But what if the marriage was based on something else besides love, namely commitment? And if it wasn't about seeking happiness of the individual so much as developing a lasting relationship between different families through creating children they both valued? What if divorce was not even an option? That is the scenario we see played out in Game of Thrones.
The first relationship where we see this become clear, is the king and his wife. They hate each other, and both cheat on each other, so their marriage is by no means the Christian ideal. But it is clearly stated that their marriage, tying together two powerful families that are otherwise at odds with one another, is what preserves peace in the kingdom for 17 years. Once one of them dies, the marriage is over, and all hell breaks loose in the power struggle that follows. The closest thing we see to divorce is the young prince breaking off his betrothal to the daughter of a man he sees as a traitor, and this is still considered a serious decision that requires the approval of the gods. And he doesn't live long enough to benefit from his replacement wife. That daughter's brother spurns an engagement he agreed to for political reasons to marry for love, in a move that was criticized by all his advisors, and led to his death. By contrast, another political marriage is forced upon a couple, and they develop a level of care for one another where there had been none before, even without the benefit of sex. So clearly the commitment aspect of marriage is strongly reinforced throughout the show, in a way that is probably more historically accurate than the passionate romances that we see in most historical movies. But marriage is also presented as a tool for social stability and family advancement. When motivated by greed, that is a bad thing, but when motivated by love, that stability provides a solid foundation for raising up the next generation.
Marrying for money is frowned upon in our culture even by those who actually do it. And marrying for looks is ridiculed, but only because marriage has been decoupled from sex. Having sex with someone based on their appearance is celebrated, but marrying them for that reason is not. Society thinks that marriage is supposed to be based a strong passionate emotional connection, which is why many high profile marriages are so short, because strong emotions rarely last long or are consistent. And that is why commitment is so important, as is the recognition that it is about more than the individual emotions. Now I am not saying that marriages should be exactly like they are in Game of Thrones, I am just saying that those marriages do have a level of commitment that our current marriage culture appears to be completely lacking.
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